I'm In it For the Aesthetic

3 notes

Anonymous asked: uh, do you have any preferred pronouns or anything like that?

Whoopsie, I thought I put this in my About Page but I guess that slipped my mind. I need to fix that tomorrow or sometime.

I do prefer They pronouns, it is how I refer and see myself, such and such.

He/She pronouns just feel me with apathy since it’s not something I associate myself with but people do it anyway.

Filed under neutral pronouns are golden Anonymous

14 notes

whimsibee:

peaches-and-cannibalism:

The problem with depression is that sometimes even during your good days there’s still this background radiation of suicidal ideation, whether it’s a passive “I wish I was dead” or an active “I should kill myself”

And you learn to live with this eventually - you can get used to the most awful things, it turns out - but the problem is this concept is basically impossible to explain to someone who hasn’t experienced it

And you quickly learn that even your most supportive neurotypical friends and family mostly think you should just snap out of it and stop feeling sorry for yourself, and the fact that they literally do not understand that this mental state isn’t a choice hurts far more than anything going on inside your own head

This is what makes me feel bad. Cause i try to understand but i just can’t. No matter how much my friends tell me how it is, and how open to the idea i am, i just can’t. I understand that they can’t snap out of it, because it is also a huge part of their life and it is something with their brain and not just a “phase” or anything like that. But i keep trying to understand and i listen to them no matter how confused i am. I think that is what people even if they don’t have any disorders or anything like that should do. Even if they don’t understand they shouldn’t agree with something that is wrong.

Eh, you shouldn’t feel too bad. At least you try to put yourself in their, our, shoes. Most people who never experienced a long period of depression (for whatever reason) could really not care less because, hey, it’s not their problem. It’s easy for them. Trust me and I don’t mean it in a cruel way, you will never understand and I hope you won’t have to deal with it first hand. I wouldn’t want to wish depression on my own worst enemy; wanting to die is not fun and having to put up with the constant pressure and anxiety of it is. Not. Pleasant.

Just try to be there for your friends. It must mean a ton for them.

Filed under text i kinda rambled at bit

14 notes

peaches-and-cannibalism:

The problem with depression is that sometimes even during your good days there’s still this background radiation of suicidal ideation, whether it’s a passive “I wish I was dead” or an active “I should kill myself”

And you learn to live with this eventually - you can get used to the most awful things, it turns out - but the problem is this concept is basically impossible to explain to someone who hasn’t experienced it

And you quickly learn that even your most supportive neurotypical friends and family mostly think you should just snap out of it and stop feeling sorry for yourself, and the fact that they literally do not understand that this mental state isn’t a choice hurts far more than anything going on inside your own head

Filed under gaaaaah true reblog text //suicide mention

25 notes

super-bidoof:

Sometimes I feel like this is the general response whenever I bring up any insecurities, social anxiety, and depression.

This is actually more of a reality now that I think back on it and past/present experiences.

super-bidoof:

Sometimes I feel like this is the general response whenever I bring up any insecurities, social anxiety, and depression.

This is actually more of a reality now that I think back on it and past/present experiences.

Filed under //negativity

27 notes

Anonymous asked: What if a person has suicidal thoughts but is too scared to act on them? I think about suicide on a daily basis and I feel like it would be really pointless for me to go to a doctor or ER or something if I know for a fact that I won't do anything. I agree with your post and I think it's great that you posted that, but I feel like people would just laugh at me if I said "I'm having suicidal thoughts and I have plan but I know I'm never going to act on it"

fuckyeahbipolarowl:

Trigger Warning: Suicidal Ideation , brief mention of self harm

I was going to bring this up in the post, but I didn’t want it to get to long. Google won’t give you much information and I don’t know much about it, except that a professional told me I have it, there’s a thing called Chronic Suicidal Ideation. Chronic means continuous and frequent and of course suicidal ideation meaning thoughts of suicide. 

I think about suicide constantly. It is quite frankly my security blanket. It’s a thought I use to calm myself. Some people get stressed and think about the ocean, I think about how I could end my life. They become a lot more frequent after my attempt, after I realized that I actually did have it in me to try (THIS IS NOT A GOOD THING). I even think about it when things aren’t bad, it’s just something I think about and plan a lot. It’s brings me a level of peace. 

And I can’t tell you how many times I’ve cried over this in therapy and how much this scares the absolute shit out of me. 

I said in the post the thing about mental illness is that while you may currently have no plans to act on them or feel that you ever will, that can change very quickly. And you never know what’s going to trigger that change. Regardless of if you have intentions to act on them or not, while it might not be necessary to go to the ER, this is still VERY VERY VERY ill thinking that needs to be discussed and worked on. Because it’s not OK.

It’s not all about what’s appears on the outside, the inside matters just as much. If you have two people who dislike themselves an “equal” amount, but one self harms and the other doesn’t, the one who self injures doesn’t need more help. They’re both still sick. 

I always try to make a comparison of mental health to physical health because it tends to hit people more, this one is hard to come up with an analogy for, the only one I can think of is that if you break your wrist on your left hand you don’t not go to a doctor because you’re right handed, but I don’t know how well that works. 

Anyways, just because you’re not acting on these thoughts (currently) doesn’t make them any less dangerous or any less harming to your psyche. 

xx Dev

Filed under oh that explains some things reblog